Item #2, My Most Embarassing Moment

When I was 15 I started doing triathlons. I had done some running and biking before, and a friend talked me into swimming and doing the whole 9 yards. There were three of us training together at the time, me and two Kims. One of the Kims (we'll call her #1) dislocated her shoulder when we took a trip to Lake Powell and couldn't do it anymore, so it was down to me and Kim #2. You must understand that I am a totally non-competitive person, whenever I would do these things I did them just for fun - if I'm running along and I think someone is trying to pass me I slow down just to make it easier for them (I do the same thing in the car), not that I'm speedy anyway....So, somehow, just for this event I start feeling a little competitive. I think it's because Kim #1 wanted to beat Kim #2 (they're both REALLY competitive) and since she was out with her injury she funnelled her competitiveness into me. I started doing extra training on the side that Kim #2 didn't know about - it was all planned by #1 and her husband - we has secret meetings to work up plans. Things were looking pretty good - I definitely could take her in the swim and the bike, and that would put me far enough ahead in the run, my weakest event and her strongest, that she wouldn't be able to catch up. A couple days before the event I had been to see my chiropractor for an adjustment. We got talking about the triathlon and he got a gleam in his eye and said "I've got something for you, I'll be right back." He's really into herbs and natural stuff. He came back with a little brown bottle that looked like something illegal. He explained to me that it was pure bee pollen and that I should drink it right after the swim for a little extra boost. Sounded fair enough.
The big morning came, and I was feeling good about things. The swim went better than planned - thank goodness for adrenaline. I had been taught that a quick transition is key, so as soon as I got my helmet and bike shorts on I hopped on my bike. I had the pollen in my hand and intented to injest it as soon as I was set on my bike. I gave a few big strokes to get moving, and set to getting my feet in the clips. I had my pollen in my left hand and my right hand was stearing. I looked at my feet for a few seconds to get clipped in. I looked up about .01 seconds before I crashed right into the back of a parked Ford Explorer. I was a little dazed as I pulled myself out from under it. I had some good scratches and cuts, but I prentended like I didn't notice them - like you do when you do something embarrasing like that. I would examine them later. I examined the car then - I had totally broken out the tail light. My bike was in not too good of shape to - the forks and tires where pretty bent up. In a stupor I started walking back towards the tranisition area, trying to find my parents to help me figure out what to do. Right then the race director saw me, walking my bike in the wrong direction. "What are you doing" he kind of yelled. "Uh, I just crashed...into that parked car......" I said. "Well, get back on and get going!" he said. What????? "What about the car I broke?" I asked. "Wel'll take care of that later, get going." At that point I realized I still had the pollen in my hand. I blame it for the whole thing - if it wasn't in my hand I could have hit the brake, or at least swerved. Bitterly I drank it down - it better really help for all the trouble it's caused. My bike was twisted up enough that for the entire 15 miles it was if I was riding with the brake on. I think most people probably finished the whole race before I was half-way through the biking leg. On a brighter note, I made better time than expected on the run. At least I got to say I finished, needles to say I didn't beat Kim #2 , I didn't beat anyone- I was dead last, obviously. Later Kim#2 asked what happened - you can imagine my embarrasment at saying that I had crashed into a PARKED car!